I Will, One Day, Go Back To Writing Things That Don't Involve The Words "The...
Oh dear, I've become something of a one trick pony, haven't I? And the only thing worse than becoming a one trick pony, I think, is becoming a one trick pony whose one trick is recapping old Bachelor...
View ArticleWhen "Better Late Than Never" Probably Doesn't Cut It
Oh, my chickens, you have been so patient. So, so, patient! In fact, it's sort of sweet how patient you've been when one thinks about the absolute rubbish you're waiting to hear about. But thank you...
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Going All The Way
Dear Barry Bonds,Thank you. No really, thank you. In fact, come here, you big hunk of love, and let me give you a hug. Now that you've hit the home run that broke Hank Aaron's record---and you did it...
View ArticleSecret Bachelor Tuesday, Back By (Reasonably) Popular Demand
From: Holly To: Nathan, Alison Are you watching?From: Nathan To: Holly, Alison THE BACHELOR IS BACK. 956 ROSES!! 620 LIMOS!!! 1,789 SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES!!From: Alison To: Nathan, Holly This...
View ArticleWhen Life Gives You Lemons, Do Body Shots With Them
"I want this damn rose ceremony to happen and I want the people who suck to go home." -- Hillary From The Bachelorread more
View ArticleA Plot Twist Worthy Of Elizabeth And Jessica Wakefield
This week for Secret Bachelor Tuesday Lite---hey, it's Tuesday where I'm writing this, okay?---I thought we'd have a little tutorial. I thought we'd talk about dates. The worst date I've ever been on...
View ArticleWhy I Am Giving Up On The Bachelor
Everything I know about life I learned from The Bachelor: namely, that reality dating shows suck and you should never trust a man who owns a bar called the Chuggin' Monkey. But then again, you probably...
View ArticleTurn On, Tune In, Drop Out
When I was in Singapore, I didn't watch TV for the entire ten days. Not sure why, really, only that I had better things to do, I guess, things like eating at buffets. Do you know how many buffets I...
View ArticleJustin Bobby For President
I think we can all admit to a slightly embarrasing celebrity crush, can't we? Mine, for example, is Justin Bobby. Are you familiar with Justin Bobby? He's the resident "bad boy" on The Hills, and I put...
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